Wednesday, August 01, 2007

Me and my Magic Wand

See this?

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This is my Magic Wand.

I can do ANYTHING with this magic wand.

Anything.





No, REALLY, I can!

I can...

...make a catered lunch appear out my ass about 45 minutes before it is supposed to show up from the caterers...just because the main speaker is hungry and forgot to eat breakfast.

...fly someone from South Africa back to the US under $200...after the guy screws up and leaves the US to attend a workshop there - violating his visa status and of course is not allowed back into the US (did I mention I can get him the new visa too?).

...reinvent the e-mail program we use for mailing list...just so our Director can just browse all of the e-mail addresses without looking at anything else that would waste time.

...summon my intuition...so I can come up with an international banking code for my Director's bank account for a payment from Ireland.

Funny, my magic wand seems to only work here at work... It seems to malfunction everywhere else - like, where I REALLY could use it.


....I think I need a new job...


I have just about had it working here.

4 comments:

Adrienne said...

OMG, this is funny! I completely understand where you're coming from. And of course they expect you to do all this while being drastically underpaid, I'm sure. I hope your week gets better ;-)

Di said...

of course you have a magic wand! Just think of it as a compliment that they think you CAN do all those things- without the wand! :) Hang in there, I know what its like when work stinks and you feel like quitting... hopefully it will pass- especially when your programs are done! You need the weekend!

Jessica said...

UGH! I so know where you are coming from. Apparantly I have one too, or need one. They expect so much!!!

:hugs: hope it gets better

Val said...

I need one of those. Do they make them in "home improvement size"? Like one that can magically clean a house, fix dinner, soothe a screaming toddler?