Vacation Chapter 1. Psychic Watch 2007: A "surprise" in store for 2008

Back in September 2006, I posted my first vacation chapter about the visit to the Boardwalk psychic. Well, since we were at the shore - and, at what other time am I going to waste $10 to do this - I had to go back to the boardwalk psychic.

To recap my 2006 reading, psychic #1 (Diana - I am distinguishing here because, well, I wasted another $10 later down the boardwalk to talk to psychic #2, Christine. Sorry, I wanted two opinions here!) mentioned several family things outside of children: long marriage, issues I needed to help my mom with, etc. She then went on to ask me "You have had several pregnancies, right?" I responded yes. She asked, "Several were not successful?" I responded yes. She asked, "How many living children do you have?" I responded 1, out of 4 pregnancies. She then said, "You are meant to have 3 living children. Don't give up, as you have the best care you can get."

At that point, she never mentioned a time frame - just that I would have three living children. Obviously that has not happened...

...at least not yet.

Hubby and I went out to dinner on Friday night, September 7th while my IL's took Chris to an ice cream parlor where they do a musical show as you eat. So, we had a lovely seafood dinner at one of the popular spots in the area and then headed to the boardwalk to walk around like we used to prior to having Chris. Of course, Hubby knew I wanted to get another reading done - as did he. So, Diana was the first stop.

I went in first. The reading started as it did the last time - she took my hands and begins to examine them, front, back, front, back... The first words out of her mouth is that I have a nice, long life-line - and a long life ahead of me. I would also be married a very long time, happily, to the same man.

So, that's good for stability for me - and consistency for her.

She then went on to say that my husband, however, had some "troubles." He has - but nothing too terrible. So, I mentioned that he just started a new job and is trying to sort some things out financially for us. She said, okay, but that was not what she meant. She said that we had some tension between us - not anything wrong with our marriage, but stress from the events of the past couple of years that has been taking a toll on us. She said we are moving past that now, and that happiness is coming.

The big thing is she sees another child or children in our future (she vacillated between 1-2 more children for us) - very future. She said that I needed to stop trying - needed to stop asking for doctor's intervention, or asking for any intervention at all. She said I will be calling her around November to say she was right - I will be pregnant after a happy 'oops' event. She felt so strongly, she gave me her card and told me to call her when it happens...

...Now, of course, this could be the carrot to get me to spend more $$$ at her winter digs NW of where we live. But, I suppose, if it happens, I will give her the call she said I would be making.

Hubby decided to go in after me - about 10 minutes later. She said very similar things to him - and more - in his session (he paid a little more $$$ for more than a standard palm reading). So, at least she agrees among our readings.

Then again, she could have figured out we were together. She was sitting outside watching for people walk by...and could have seen us walking together.

Anywho, after the reading, we compared notes while we walked down the boardwalk, trying to decide what we wanted to do next. We headed in to Luck Leo's to "gamble" for points. After a little while, we got board and walked the boardwalk again...

...And then came to the next psychic's storefront (uh, there are three on this particular boardwalk). I told Hubby I wanted to do another reading - this time with the Christine (I am fond of the name - could you guess?).

So, I went in and she was standing in the doorway of the storefront, as if she were just waiting for me to come in. It was weird - unlike Diana, who was just sitting there waiting for a patron. It felt like she just knew I was coming in.

Her reading started like Diana's - she took my hands and begins to examine them, front, back, front, back... I guess this is part is the same with all psychics.

First, she asked how long I was with my partner. So, I asked her did she want years of marriage or years together. She said she wanted years together. So, I mentioned we would know each other twenty years this month. She, too, said I have a nice, long life-line - and a long life ahead of me. And, she said based on how long we have been together, Hubby and I would also be married a very long time, happily. I was kinda "stuck" with him. She laughed at that.

She, too, mentioned the tensions between us - again, not anything wrong with our marriage, but stress from the past couple of years that has been taking a toll. However, she sent on to specify that I needed to start keeping things to myself - that, in sharing how I felt to "all of the world," that I was being talked about and in a round-about way, sabotaged. She then went on to specifically mention that I needed to stop sharing so much of myself with my IL's - really, my MIL. Not that she is a bad person or using the information in the wrong way, but she does talk to other family and to my husband - and that she butts her 2 cents in too much. She felt that if I filtered what I told her and kept some things more private, life would be a little less stressful for me.

Now, I know she does talk - based on how she talks about everyone else. Again, it is not really in a malicious way, but just to put her 2 cents in. So, I know Christine is right on that.

She also mentioned that things regarding an immediate family issue would be resolved in about 2 weeks of the reading she was doing. When she said that, I immediately thought of the evals we are trying to get done for Chris and getting him placed in the right program.

** The ironic thing from this is that 1) Chris had a great first speech therapy session yesterday - the therapist told my MIL she wanted to know where the child in the eval went because he was so greatly improved in a month without therapy and 2) We have made a lot of progress this week with the child study team in town (we meet with them tomorrow) and other private services we have inquired about in two days of being home from vacation. We seem to have a good handle on what is going on for Chris and hope we will know what he will be going into over the next two weeks.

She said I had a rough summer at work - and that I handled myself gracefully and everyone knows the truth of what happened. But, I need to learn to stand up for myself and stop being everyone's go-to person - i.e., I have to stop allowing myself to be used. I need to get my confidence back in my work and learn to say "no" to things.

Also, she mentioned that financially, we have been working to really get things stabilized for a better future. She said that would happen around February 2008 - and that there would most likely be property transaction in the mix.

She said an unexpected trip in November is going to be taken. No mention of where or how far. But, I'm up for almost anything to get out of work!

And, she said that 2008 and 2009 are going to be very happy years - the sorrows of 2005-2007 are all in the past now, where they need to be, and things are lining up nicely for a happy family and financial future.

Last, but certainly not least, she mentioned the issue of children.

She said that she saw four pregnancies - and asked how many children I actually had. I told her I had one child - and three miscarriages after him. She told me that she sees me very, VERY pregnant come this spring. She specifically sees one boy (Chris) and one girl (the child I would be pregnant with in the spring) - I was meant to have two children: no more, no less. She was so matter of fact about it, I felt like she was reading it in a history textbook.

She, too, said that I needed to stop trying to conceive - I needed to stop asking for doctor's intervention, stop trying to monitor my cycles, stop adding stress on myself to make the timing perfect and allow this to happen when it should. I wouldn't need any help - I will be pregnant all on my very own.

I need to stop trying - and start living and let this happen.

That is one of my biggest wishes in this world - to get PG all on my very own. To prove that my body is capable of doing what it should.

When the reading ended, I gave her my $10 and she wished me the best of luck. She hoped that

I walked out to meet Hubby. He asked me if I thought she was right on her reading - but he didn't even give me a chance to tell him what she said. I told him, yes, I did think she could be right. She, after all, agreed with and elaborated on things Diana mentioned earlier in the night.

So, he decided he would go in too (of course, not just for a palm reading but an aura reading - SUCKER!!!). About twenty minutes later, he came out absolutely astonished. He never spoke except to say what reading he wanted and to pay her - she told him all about me (details about my m/c's I just never shared with her - I only told her I had three total) and how my sorrow had ruled me for so long. She told him about how well our futures looked - both family wise and career-wise. She told him how the things he has been working toward will finally pay off - as long as he doesn't lose confidence in himself.

She basically agreed with three other readings in the same night - and then some.

Of course, again, she could have figured out we were together. But, I am very, very sure she didn't see us together - and there were a few people waiting to see her that night, which made it hard to tell who was with who.

Do I believe what two psychics are agreeing on? That I might get PG on my own, without trying? That, if I stop planning - which is how I spent my entire TTC life, including when TTC Chris - the right time, around events in my life, that this might happen finally?

I don't know. I don't think I can live my life fully based on $20 worth of storefront psychic readings.

But, they are right that I need to start living and stop planning - which is really soooo my nature.

So, maybe - just maybe - they could be on to something.

For now, I am going to take these "insights" - that two independent women agree on - and use some of it for positives in my life. I am going to live for a while, focusing on Chris and the things I am interested in; I am going to stop charting completely (I threw out my left over OPK's this morning) and only chart periods; I will re-evaluate the whole TTC thing in the new year, once we know Chris is progressing well; I will stop focusing on the fact that I will be 35 in January and that it is not the TTC time-bomb I keep making myself believe it is.

Maybe - just maybe - living my life happily will bring what I am supposed to have into my life...

...Our lives.