Good Friday and some current thoughts

Today is Good Friday... Although we have not really observed the Lenten season like we should have, today is a good day to reflect on some things that have been going on. I have not been faithful going to actual mass at all - but, you know what? Right now, I really don't feel I need the rituals of mass to fuel my faith. I have been keeping an "open dialogue" of sorts with God, and right now, I feel that is all I need. We will be going to Easter Sunday mass with Chris - and, maybe after that, attendance of mass will become a little more common. I really want him to have faith and learn it young - the main reason for us to go to mass more often. But, for me, mass has become just a ritual and I really don't feel it makes my connection to God that much stronger.

Anyeays, first, I wanted ask all of you to say a prayer for one of my co-workers. Her BIL was diagnosed with cancer a few months ago (I am not sure where it started, but it spread rather fast to other areas). She called this morning to say the aggressive treatments he started a couple of weeks ago are not working and they called his children to come home from college this morning. Things are not looking good, and they could use any prayers they can get right now. Please keep them in your prayers this weekend - that they find some peace, no matter the outcome.

We had the ceremony honoring my office as a 2007 Compassionate Employer (see my post on 2007 Compassionate Friends Compassionate Employers Awards) yesterday. Rutgers will actually be publishing an article in the monthly Focus publication for faculty, staff and alumni - I will be getting a proof today. When it comes, I will post it for all of you. It was very nice to see everyone who helped me through my losses publically acknowledged for their care and concern. It will be even more interesting for me to see my story in print for the entire University and alumni to see.

I mailed out over 190 resumes for Hubby on Monday from work - he has already received 5 requests for interviews! Please say a prayer that some of these inquiries turn into offers - and that, whatever job he choses to take, it will be a good one and long term. He likes the fact his current boss at least appreciates his work - although he is a complete ass for other reasons. It would be nice to see him find a place to work where there is both respect of work and respect of self and family.

I have been going back onto the loss boards more on FF these days... I have stayed away for a while because every time I would go on, my anxiety would start to flair up. But, now that I am going back a bit, I am no longer getting that reaction. June/July is our target date to start TTC again - and I really think I am READY for this. If all goes well, I should have my next period in mid-June (if it follows the 77-day cycle rule again), can start Clomid and prepare for the IUI and, well, we will see how it goes from there. The only obstical is the Thyroid b/w in late May - if my TSH is not below 2.0 by then, I may consider delaying TTC a little longer. I will be talking to Dr. S about that on Tuesday when I go in for the thyroid u/s. I am supposed to see her on July 2nd for a follow-up - but, if we wanted to start earlier, she would push that appointment up.

I can't believe I am really ready for this...

Chris is such the ham! I have to put a bunch of his latest pics together (the MIL is kinda hording them right now) - we have some great ones, including him in the sandbox, him Easter Egg hunting. His speech has really taken off now that he is in school, which is great. I have to get back to my Christopher Friday posts, which I will resume next week (work kinda has cut into the posting time lately). For now, though, I will share the story of him and his "ocean."

He calls any body of water an ocean - including his tub. So, now when he is in the tub, he likes to start kicking his legs so the water turns into tidalwaves and he starts yelling "Help!! The ocean is rough!!" Usually, water is all over the bathroom floor (especially because we have the original claw-foot tub with now shower enclosure) when he is done, and I have to put the towels in the washer - but, it is worth the soaking-wet aftermath to watch him have so much fun! I am not sure where he got the words from, but I am sure the pool is going to be very interesting this summer!

So, I have been listening to John Mellencamp in the car lately, specifically the album "Mr. Happy Go Lucky," which my friend K and I caught when he was touring back in 1997. I love the last song...and figured I would share it with you. Enjoy!

Life Is Hard
by John Mellencamp

Life is hard anyway you cut it
Life is sweet, like a berry from a tree
Life is temptation, baby, every single day
Life is hard

Life is funny, I don't mean ha-ha
It's not always sunny, when it needs to be
Life is frightening, nothing lasts forever
Life is hard

My time
Is next to nothing
My time
Falls on you, yeah
Everything
Is in motion
Life is hard

Life is precious, no matter how you see it
Life is crazy, like yellow fishes in the street
Life is lonely when you're not with me
Life is hard

Gentlemen
Is that you story
Hanging religion from a tree, yeah
My time is next to nothing
Life is hard

My time
Is next to nothing
My time
Falls on you, yeah
Everything
Is in motion
Life is hard
Hard
Hard
Hard
My time
Falls on you, yeah
Life is hard
Life is hard